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If you can't afford a sandwich alarm

This story from the Post about lunch bags with mold effect on them to prevent coworkers stealing your stuff from the office fridge makes me so happy I no longer work in an office. I’d all but wiped from my memory that particular aspect of office life—the angry emails about purloined yogurt and MIA roast beef sandwiches.

Side note: Am I the only person who stared at the bag Paul grabbed from the refrigerator last night on Mad Men, trying to figure out whose name was written on it? I rewound three times and finally decided it said Paul, though the P looked like an S. Maybe his late night alter ego is named Saul.

Another side note: let’s just say you had a big hunk of cheese in the bag, would the faux mold still be a deterrent?

Another side note (this blog post is a hexagon, methinks): what are some good names for faux mold? fun mold? silly mold? fool’s mold?

Another side note: I’m procrastinating

Another side note: Ok so I was ambitious when I said hexagon.

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Big news! I bought a spaghetti squash.

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Shhhh…. It’s sleeping.

But wait, that’s not all that happened at the store. I also bought unsweetened Coconut Milk

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because they were out of unsweetened Almond Milk.

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Both of which I buy because no one carries Calorie Countdown

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which was my milk of choice. So anyway I’m at the store yesterday asking the guy who works there if they’re out of unsweetened Almond Milk and a woman overhears me and asks why I prefer that specific Almond Milk to another brand. “Oh, it’s that it has fewer calories,” I explain. Then, suddenly realizing that I’m really a vast storehouse of information about faux milk and that it’s my duty to pass along my hard earned wisdom and wow, this woman really couldn’t have stumbled upon a better person to ask, I went on to explain that if you put it in coffee, Blue Diamond won’t chunk up whereas Pacific will. Then I followed her around the store yelling more bits of trivia about milk. I think she appreciated it.

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