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Author Archive | Alison Rosen
One more petty criticism
When you’re at a party that’s too loud to hear anyone but not too loud to hide the fact that you were repeatedly calling someone by the wrong name.
(oh and by the way, since you guys were asking/commenting, many of the particular things you mentioned from the Petty Criticism story were Dustin’s. We each wrote our own. Mine were “actionable” (and the fact that it’s now in the dictionary), getting carsick in winter gear, sweet n low, the monolithic JA phenomenon and the way Dustin totally crowded the list with his own picks. I am kidding.
Well, I did
A homeless man told me I looked “spiffy” tonight. Okay fine, he wasn’t just a homeless man, he was my homeless man. The one who lives on my corner. And while I didn’t give him any money, I appreciated his discerning taste.
Petty criticisms
Dustin and I dashed off a brief list of junk that bugs us (to coincide with the critics issue) and turned it into a story that resembles a brief list of things that bug us! Upon reading it though, I’m realizing it’s really just scratching the surface.
Weird
How odd is it that just when I say I need my comments, they get stuck in some comment holding place? Some comment purgatory? Some comment queueueueue? I think it’s weird. And it makes me feel powerful. I just haven’t figured out how yet to harness that power. So I have a post banging around in my head about how people keep confusing me with Julia Allison (and her with me) and yet I can’t quite bring myself to write it for fear of exacerbating the situation or appearing to somehow want to glom on to her internet popularity. In fact, I think the whole phenomenon of her (and it’s likely just a local thing) is something warranting some kind of boring academic semiotics based discussion and yet I won’t do it, because I don’t want to be responsible for any attention about the attention (meta-attention? metattention? blech), good or bad. But I will say that at first it was just fan letters and the occasional question that had nothing to do with me (“You’re really good friends with Rachel Sklar, right?” to which I’d say “No, you’re thinking of Julia Allison.”) (I’ve also received questions about Halloween costumes I had no intention of wearing, compliments on my HD debut, questions about why I hadn’t been on Red Eye lately when I’d been on the night before, etc. I don’t know what she gets about me, but she told me she’s gotten mail meant for me. But then a Fox security guard told me he gets us confused because “you look just like each other” which takes this to a whole new level because I thought it was the name and the TONY association plus maybe the dark hair. So, that’s weird, because looking like her is very much not how I see myself, though I’m becoming more and more aware that I don’t see myself as I appear. Um, I lost my train of thought. Okay then!
Dogs on blogs
Me: Want to see something adorable? This is my parents new puppy! (showing coworker blog post below with photos of dog)
Coworker: Oh, so your parents have a blog too?
Me: [long pause] No, this is my blog.
Unrelated, I feel like I should be putting this on one of those Tumblrblogs which everyone’s using now however why hasn’t anyone noticed that those don’t allow for comments? Or maybe they do and I just haven’t seen an example of one that does. But I need my comments, even if you guys are hoping I’ll crack up on TV and having trouble continuing! Just kidding, I know it was gently good natured. (For what it’s worth, I think that would actually make for fairly good TV. It’s blanking out or spacing out or swallowing wrong and having a coughing fit that are my perennial fears!)
Okay, so here are the names being considered:
Buster, Oscar, Quincy, Skippy, Oliver, Henry, Harry, Simon… I feel like I’m forgetting some. Ernie, Max, Winston… Yeah. I think that’s the list. Weigh in won’t you?
I'll be on Red Eye Tonight
So watch! I’ll be wearing either brown or greenish blue. Exciting!
I prefer dogs to politics
However, did I really just hear a certain president say “the sticks and carrots approach”?
I think I did. Wow.
A really long post about dogs
Adorable Puppy X (look at its little feet! at first you think it’s just a head floating on a white background but if you look close you can make out the outline of its little puppy body.)
Unnamed Puppy
I’m watching a Letterman rerun and Tom Cruise is talking about how naming Suri wasn’t an ordeal because he and “Kate” just “looked at eachother and knew.” Well my parents aren’t having the same luck with their new puppy, pictured above. My sister and I have been sending them lists of possibilities. I’m pretty overjoyed with the fact that they’re finally getting a dog after four long years of utter doglessness. Maybe that’s just how long it took them to get over Woofie, whom I still miss and who I sometimes think I hear running down the hall when I’m in their house and I forget, for a second, that he’s gone. Some pictures of Woofie? If you insist:
Woofie as a puppy
Woofie just hanging out
Woofie guarding the dishwasherBut Woofie would have wanted them to get a new dog! I’ve already fallen in love with this new one. My sister and I just stare at the pictures and coo. But we need a name! If you have any ideas, let me know! I’ll be seeing the dog when I fly out to California in a few weeks to be with my sister while she’s having surgery (she is okay. I should probably get her permission before I write in any detail but suffice it to say, it was scary, but she is okay.) Anyway, I’m glad there’s a puppy on the other side of that plane ride.
This morning's segment
was interesting because the hair woman handed me this plastic face-sized shield to hold over my face while she sprayed my hair. It was innovative. Also kind of science-fictiony. As for the actual segment, I asked a couple people who work there how they thought it went and it turned out neither of them had watched because “you’re a seasoned pro.” “That’s right,” I said, sprinkling myself with oregano and stuffing bay leaves in my shoes.
Here’s the link to the segment. It’s shot from my worse side, by the way. I feel like I’m becoming asymmetrical. On a scale of Ellen Barkin to Picasso, I’m Alison Rosen.