Here we are, about to leave the office.
Earlier that day I developed a speech impediment
Author Archive | Alison Rosen
OMG I'm still uploading these
Am I blowing my vlog wad? Is that crude? It is. Anyway, here’s another!
Then we almost got lost and Alison rambled even more than usual
Then we talked about stuff. deep stuff!
Day 3: lunch
Please note the hair on the back of my coat
Day 3: And then Anna kind of fell and it was weird (but she's ok!)
Day 3: We totally got kicked out of the office!
But don’t worry, I’m uploading this from the cozy yet airy confines of the office. No one can say goodbye to us for long!
I'm way too busy to deal with outdated sock conventions
All the cool people in my apartment—and yes, I’m the only person in my apartment—have decided no longer to buckle to the pressure to match socks. Do you hear me, Hanes? NO MORE.
Wait, not Hanes. Actually I think these socks are Calvin Klein. Well, one of them at least. Does Hanes even make socks? God, I’m so socktarded!
Anyway, I now look homeless from the ankle down. It’s very chic.
Conversations with a horny magic 8 ball
Me: Do you think of me as someone with a chipped tooth? I mean, it’s very slight, but still…
Horny magic 8 ball: Concentrate and make out with me
Me: I beg your pardon!
Things I Won't Be Doing On Superbowl Sunday
Yelling at a television set
Painting my face
Counting the layers in any sort of bean dip type situation
Claiming there are seven layers despite a fellow bean dip lover’s insistence that there are eight
Talking about what I was doing at exactly this time last year
Taking a cross-section of said dip and counting the layers
Wearing a jersey
Getting frustrated regarding bean dip kerfuffle and shooting friend in the face
With easy cheese!
Tossin’ the pigskin
Slappin’ the salami
Chokin’ the chicken
Wait, this is the wrong kind of list
Rooting for “my” team
Understanding how the game works
Shotgunning beers
Riding shotgun… on the couch!
Officiating at any sort of shotgun wedding
Doing any sort of special touchdown dance
Taking odds
Performing at half time
Wearing my lucky underwear