Save the date rape
All of a sudden infant death syndrome
Out of the blue balls
Studying for the big final solution
Have mercy killing
You’re golden showers
Not my cup of tea bagging
Moby Dick Head
Diana and I talked about her radio show and her favorite curse word.
I may have done a horrible James Lipton impression.
Episode 2: The Biffnies
Another video! Diana and me after Paltalk
And here’s one of Diana and me after Paltalk.
Clips from Paltalk with Diana Falzone
Did you miss my appearance on Paltalk? Sure you did. Have you been crying ever since? Yes you have! Do you enjoy when I ask you questions and then answer them for you? Affirmative! Do you want to hear about my hormones today? No you don’t! Was that TMI? TOTALLY! Are you uncomfortable with where this is going? Pretty much, yes.
In that case I’ll just post this:
things for your thing
So I’m at the drugstore buying Spenda tablets which I switched to from packets because they’re easier to melt down and turn into bathtub methamphetamine when I overhear one of the cashiers repeatedly saying to the other one, “What flavor do you got? What flavor do you got?” I have my head down because I’m paying with my ATM card and I’m typing in the code on the little LCD screen but the insistent way she’s asking is not unlike how I pester my sister when I ask her a question and she doesn’t answer. Mind you, I’m the older one.
Anyway, so she’s asking the other cashier what flavor hers is and I’m imagining they’re talking about Jolly Ranchers or sports drinks. That’s what I’m picturing.
“You always carry it in your purse?” asks the cashier. At this point I look up and see the other one holding this, clearly embarrassed:
“You spray it on your thing…” she hisses.
My interview with Michael Showalter, ep 1
So I took down the previous version and put this one up instead. It’s still processing so give it a little while before clicking. I think it’s more watchable. I might put the other one up again though. I don’t know. I’m unpredictable. Trying to catch me is like trying to catch a wave upon the sand.
Interviews with Michael Showalter, part 1
So yesterday I interviewed Michael Showalter (Stella, The State, Wet Hot American Summer) for about an hour and now I have all this footage which I’m trying to figure out how to best cut into a series of awesome and hard-hitting interviews. Also, we plan to do more since we barely scratched the surface of all the important things we wanted to talk about like reality TV and other TV. Also, sexual fetishes. Anyway, as I was putting together the first one, above, I was faced with the choice of editing it so it’s a little slicker and professional seeming and probably faster paced or leaving in the super awkward sort of in-between exchanges which I did because that’s the closest in spirit to the original radio interviews and I was thinking this will be like those radio interviews brought to life. And yet today I’m thinking maybe a little of ME goes a long way and also, maybe that wasn’t the best part of those radio interviews anyway. Also, I’m torn because fans of me (hi guys!) who are watching these will probably like (?) the beginning stuff but then fans of Michael Showalter will just want more of him and WHAT TO DO? This is why I need a professional editor. Also, someone to make opening titles. And a theme song. Also I should fix a lot of those titles since the fonts are all weird.
So maybe I’ll go back and whittle down this interview and then we can do a comparison? Or maybe I won’t. Hm.
Rotating basil potatoes
I have two things to say.
1. This Meyer’s countertop spray in basil scent which I bought because I liked the packaging doesn’t really work in terms of cleaning but boy, it sure smells good!
2. I passed a second hand furniture place today and there was a table on display with a small sticker in the corner which said “top potatoes.” It drew me in because it made no sense. Upon closer examination I saw that it said “top rotates.” The whole thing reminded me of “easy pickles.”