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My new thing

Did you hear about my new thing? It’s that it takes me for-fucking-ever to write and some of what I write turns out to be crap! Unless you are one of my editors/bosses in which case I am lightning quick and only ever brilliant.

Seriously though, I feel like I’ve been wearing this constipated writer look on my face for days now and it’s interfering with my otherwise beautiful visage and sadly frizzled hair (yes, I know it’s not a word but I think it should be. the FRIZZLING being from the body wash as shampoo fiasco of two posts ago). What was I saying? I don’t know but I wish the writing just poured out of me in sheets of awesomeness but instead it seems to come out a tiny drip at a time. I need a brain colonic. I also need to stop with all the disgusting metaphors. Sorry readers. I’m tired and gross.

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0 Responses to My new thing

  1. Anonymous July 18, 2008 at 12:38 am #

    Quote of the writing:

    “I too am having a little trouble with my English at this point even with my own language. Can someone tell me what the phrase “Everybody Wang Chung ToNIght” stands for ?

    —–Jackie Chan

  2. Anonymous July 18, 2008 at 2:02 am #

    Another Quote:

    Yeah it’s Friday !!!!

    Robert Smith

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OxZuj77tUHk

  3. Joe July 18, 2008 at 7:59 am #

    Maybe you’re being haunted by the ghost of Nathaniel Hawthorne, who once wrote to his publisher to complain about the “damned mob of scribbling women” whose books were selling so well they were driving “more deserving writers” (like himself) out of the marketplace.

    But that was over 150 years ago, and you’d think he’d have gotten it out of his system by now.

  4. Brett Jones July 18, 2008 at 9:21 am #

    It’s the damn heat, sucking the smart and quick witted right out of your head.

  5. Toddrod July 18, 2008 at 11:17 am #

    Alison, whenever you curse in your blog, it really hits me. There is a part of me that must be a prude because I want to say, “Stop! This is not how young women should talk!” However, I realize that you are a writer, and you sometimes have to smack your readers around to get their attention. I understand that carefully placed profanity can be powerful…dogumit.

    Toddrod

  6. Tyson July 18, 2008 at 11:46 am #

    I like it when Alison talks dirty.

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