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Author Archive | Alison Rosen

I can't sleep

Stupid jet lag and time change. But the real winner is you, blog readers, because I thought I’d use my inability to go to sleep to make a list of things I could be doing with this time! Here goes:

1) making a list of things I could be doing instead of sleeping
2) wishing I were sleeping
3) looking at the clock and thinking about how many hours it is until I have to be up
4) counting stuff
5) not sheep!
6) waiting for my eyes to adjust to the dark
7) wishing I were sleeping
8) being repetitive
9) repeating myself
10) oh I did not
11) no, I did
12) I see that now
13) so sleepy
14) kinda have to go to the bathroom
15) going to the bathroom
16) coming back

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Wendy has a website for her book and she didn't even tell me

What kind of asshole doesn’t tell you about their fetching new website? It’s not like she’s afraid of being self-promotional. God, I think maybe she’s blog cheating on me. That’s the only explanation. I mean, I don’t really understand why that would account for her not telling me, nor do I really understand what “blog cheating” would be, but sometimes the least plausible explanation is the obvious one. In this case it’s not, but I’m not ruling it out either.

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Does anyone else

ever suspect those Snapple “real facts” are total bullshit?

To wit: real fact #124 “Seals sleep only one and a half minutes at a time.”

Really? I once napped with a seal and excuse me, but I think I would have noticed if he was up every 90 seconds.

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