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Archive | dogs

a disgusting question

Greeting blog readers. I turn to you because I’m in a pickle. Actually, I’m not personally but my parents are and since I’m still here I’m privy to the pickle: Tobey is eating his tobeys, if you know what I’m saying. What does it mean? I kind of think it’s something that’s aesthetically disgusting to humans but not to dogs, and so perhaps a bit of acceptance and vigilance is required, instead of training the dog not to do it since I think yelling NO at him when he’s just gone to the bathroom might send him confusing messages. Or maybe I’m thinking he’s more like a small child than a dog and so I’m off base? What would the dog whisperer do?

In other news, I went to an OC Weekly reunion last night.

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happy holidays

Merry Christmas to everyone! On this most holy of days I thought I’d share a little factoid I learned at a party the other night: Tobey is slang for crap in England. As in “I’ve gotta drop a tobey.” Deligtful!

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I'm in Playboy

No, not like that! In the January 2008 issue they round up the Year in Sex and they blurbed my exchange with Ed Koch (here’s the story as it originally appeared in Time Out New York). Thanks to the reader who tipped me off. That sounds dirty, doesn’t it? Funny how everything can sound dirty when you view the world through flesh-colored glasses.

Also, I will post more photos soon. I have more Tobey photos and I have a bunch of me after various TV things which I took in case I wanted to try to remember how they did my makeup.

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You Don't Know Dick About Christmas!

The title of this post is what I’ve dubbed the new game my sister and I have been playing. My mom bought my sister Christmas trivia cards which are actually pretty fun except most of the answers are one of the following: Bob Hope, Bob Cratchit or The Lemondrop Kid.

Before my sister’s surgery I was asking her questions from the cards to distract her and the nurse asked if she was preparing to go on Jeopardy, which cracked me up.

In other news, I’m going to be on Red Eye on Saturday and I believe it’s going to be a special kind of episode.

But back to gameshows, I can’t understand Duel. And I don’t like melodramatic contestants.

Also, Tobey keeps throwing up.

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Tobey it is!

Tobias Potato Rosen is the full name, although when I hold him a stream of names and jibberish starts coming out of my mouth, interspersed with the words puppy, baby and face, so basically I pick him up and then it’s “Tobey Puppy Potato Tobias Baby Face Puppy Tobey yes you are. Awwww…” If I werent so tired from the flight, I’d have lost all respect for myself. On the plane I watched Juno which made me cry a little, though it’s funny, and which I’d definitely recommend. I can’t even tell if I’m making sense anymore. I’m going to go stare at a puppy.

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Unnamed puppy's first night home

Last night my parents picked up the puppy. My sister and I called to hear how it went and my sister asked my mom to hold the phone up the the puppy so he could lick the phone. My mom said he didn’t know what to do with it. Not that I’m comparing this guy to Woofie, but Woofie would have known. Maybe not when he was a puppy though.

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new puppy name

Emmett. What do you think? My sister and I are strongly supporting this choice. Perhaps because I hold a special place in my heart for Emmett Otter’s Jug-band Christmas. Also, Emmett from Queer as Folk.

Also, while talking a lot about Bob Saget this morning I found out that the Britney Spears biography I was interviewed for is airing Thursday at 9pm on the A&E Biography channel so if you get that channel, watch it!

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Dogs on blogs

Me: Want to see something adorable? This is my parents new puppy! (showing coworker blog post below with photos of dog)
Coworker: Oh, so your parents have a blog too?
Me: [long pause] No, this is my blog.

Unrelated, I feel like I should be putting this on one of those Tumblrblogs which everyone’s using now however why hasn’t anyone noticed that those don’t allow for comments? Or maybe they do and I just haven’t seen an example of one that does. But I need my comments, even if you guys are hoping I’ll crack up on TV and having trouble continuing! Just kidding, I know it was gently good natured. (For what it’s worth, I think that would actually make for fairly good TV. It’s blanking out or spacing out or swallowing wrong and having a coughing fit that are my perennial fears!)

Okay, so here are the names being considered:

Buster, Oscar, Quincy, Skippy, Oliver, Henry, Harry, Simon… I feel like I’m forgetting some. Ernie, Max, Winston… Yeah. I think that’s the list. Weigh in won’t you?

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A really long post about dogs

Adorable Puppy X (look at its little feet! at first you think it’s just a head floating on a white background but if you look close you can make out the outline of its little puppy body.)

Unnamed Puppy

I’m watching a Letterman rerun and Tom Cruise is talking about how naming Suri wasn’t an ordeal because he and “Kate” just “looked at eachother and knew.” Well my parents aren’t having the same luck with their new puppy, pictured above. My sister and I have been sending them lists of possibilities. I’m pretty overjoyed with the fact that they’re finally getting a dog after four long years of utter doglessness. Maybe that’s just how long it took them to get over Woofie, whom I still miss and who I sometimes think I hear running down the hall when I’m in their house and I forget, for a second, that he’s gone. Some pictures of Woofie? If you insist:

Woofie as a puppy

Woofie just hanging out

Woofie guarding the dishwasher

But Woofie would have wanted them to get a new dog! I’ve already fallen in love with this new one. My sister and I just stare at the pictures and coo. But we need a name! If you have any ideas, let me know! I’ll be seeing the dog when I fly out to California in a few weeks to be with my sister while she’s having surgery (she is okay. I should probably get her permission before I write in any detail but suffice it to say, it was scary, but she is okay.) Anyway, I’m glad there’s a puppy on the other side of that plane ride.

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More Wrong Reasons to Get a Dog

I’m thinking about getting a dog, which I’ve been thinking about for awhile, so I decided to thumb through the ASPCA’s Complete Guide to Dogs, which I’m sad to report doesn’t have enough cute pictures. I came to a page called “The Wrong Reasons to Get a Dog” and it includes such wrongs reasons as “because you are lonely,” “to teach a child how to be responsible,” “because you feel sorry for a dog in pet shop,” “because you think your home needs protection” and “as a surprise gift.” Great list, I tittered to myself, under my breath. It stops just short of being useful! Naturally I leapt into the breach.

More wrong reasons to get a dog:

Because you are hungry
Because your last one died and you want to replace it–with parts from the new one
Because you’re tired of walking around and you have this saddle just collecting dust (only works with big dogs)
Because you’re tired of dating (ditto)
Two legs bad, four legs sexy!
Because you’ve never bedazzled a moving target
You want to enter it into dog shows (just kidding!)
You want to breed a puppy and a guppy (it doesn’t work, btw. water everywhere!)
You found a most curious book called “To Serve Dog”
Those tiny sweaters aren’t just going to wear themselves

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